How to spend a day at Universal Epic Universe

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The Wizarding World of Harry Potter™ — Ministry of Magic™ is obviously a must stop and first on the list. In a departure from the first two Harry Potter-themed worlds at Universal, guests are welcomed to 1920s-era Paris from the “Fantastic Beasts” series. Through the portal, I’m transported to the Paris Metro, where a beautiful Parisian street opens up, lined with shops and cafes all adorned in wizarding décor.

The big draw is the Battle at the Ministry ride. Entering the queue, I briefly left 1920s Paris for the British Ministry of Magic in the 1990s. Specifically, where the villainous Dolores Umbridge awaits her trial. The line fills up fast, so get there early.

Though the ride is spectacular, the entryway leading up is so detailed and ornate, you almost forget you’re waiting at all. The replica of the Ministry is breathtaking, while wizards and witches jet past with their floo powder.

Breakfast is back in Paris, at Café L’air De La Sirène™. Indulge in traditional French brunch fare dressed up with some magic. I tried the Butterbeer™ Crepe, topped with the cream from the signature Butterbeer™ found at stands scattered across every Wizarding World. It’s decadent and delicious – and pairs well with a Giggle Water™ (an elderflower spritz to you muggles).

An introduction to the world of “How to Train Your Dragon” etched in stone is what you’ll find entering the Isle of Berk. It includes more than a few warnings about the dragons you might encounter. But I have a warning of my own: ride the attractions before you indulge in the Thawfest Platter at the Mead Hall. Trust me.

The platter, a true Viking-style feast, serves up glazed chicken drumsticks, grilled salmon, sausage, roasted carrots, grilled onions, fries and a flight of side sauces. It takes bravery to train a dragon, but it takes a far more fearless stomach to tame this feast before entertaining any rides.

Let’s say you are fearless. Here’s what you should ride: Hiccup’s Wing Gliders and the Dragon Racer’s Rally – both excellent, high-flying fun. But this world’s real heart comes from interacting with the dragons and Vikings throughout the park. In just 20 minutes, I chatted with a shockingly movie-accurate Stoick the Vast, got blasted with frost by a life-sized Snow Wraith and met arguably the park’s biggest celebrity: the one and only Toothless.

The Isle of Berk is also a great stop for families with young children. The Fyre Drill ride is a slower-paced boat cruise where children (and children at heart) ride ships, blasting targets with water guns. There’s also the Viking Training Camp, an elaborate playground where kids can run wild. As a father to two toddlers, trust me on this, I’ve never seen anything like it.

Not to date myself or anything, but I was born the same year the original Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) was released in the U.S. Yes, the Mario Brothers partially raised me (sorry, mom). Needless to say, experiencing Super Nintendo World was at the top of my list.

I’ve spent decades imagining what it would be like to drive a real-life Mario Kart. I didn’t think anything could meet my expectations. But, my friends, when you put on the AR goggles – attached to your very own Mario cap – and start shooting red shells at Bowser, it’s not hyperbolic to say it’s a dream come true. Because I’ve had that dream. And then, I did it for real. What more can I say?

At other Super Nintendo Worlds, Super Mario doesn’t share the stage. But at Universal Epic Park, he has a co-star (and it’s not Luigi). While most of this world is still the brightly colored 8-bit magic of Super Mario Land™, just around the corner from the familiar Toadstool Cafe™ is Donkey Kong Country™.

Once here, head straight for the Bubbly Barrel for a DK Crush Float in a souvenir mug. Delectable banana and pineapple soft serve floats in a cup of pineapple soda, topped with crushed toffee and caramel corn. It’s an absolute sugar rush.

This frozen treat might just give you the courage to attack the Mine-Cart Madness™ ride, which is based on the most stressful video game level of all time, the mine cart stage in Donkey Kong Country for Super Nintendo. If you know, you know. It’s the reason my generation has anxiety. But, compared to that, the ride itself is a breeze.

As the sun set, dark storm clouds began rolling in when I crossed Celestial Park to the final portal. I admit, I didn’t really know quite what to expect when I entered Dark Universe and found myself in the creepy Darkmoor village. A frantic (and committed) Igor approached me, with a severed leg in his hand, and asked if I needed directions.

“I’m good.”

It was close to dinner time, but I wanted to try one last ride first, and this one did not disappoint. Monsters Unchained: The Frankenstein Experiment takes you through Dr. Victoria Frankenstein’s (Victor’s granddaughter) workshop as she introduces her latest version of Frankenstein’s monster. What came next was shocking and thrilling.

Riders are placed in four-seat pods suspended a few feet above the track by a beam with a hinge that moves like a joystick: forward, back, left, right – all while hurdling down a track past every iconic Universal monster. You actually feel the Wolfman’s drool hit you in the face at one point. The visual effects and the ride mechanics made it, in my opinion, the most memorable ride at the park.

Post-ride and starved, I wandered into the delightfully-named Das Stakehouse, a Dracula-themed restaurant for my final … ahem … bite of the evening. The food is particularly on theme, with chicken on a stake, fish on a stake and, of course, steak on a stake.

I had to try the Black Wings – fried chicken wings with a tasty black sauce drizzled on top, and the macabre cheeseburger, complete with a black bun, washing everything down with a goblet of Darkthorne Mead. I tried not to pay too much attention to the fact that this drink looked quite like something the Count might enjoy.

I’d say, “Don’t sleep on Dark Universe,” but once you get through it all, you won’t feel much like sleeping.

Truthfully, it would be too on-the-nose to call this an “epic” day. But, after I sipped a nightcap at the Celestiki bar overlooking Celestial Park, while the fountain and carousel projected a dazzling display of lights, I have no problem saying this really was a perfect day.

And now that the park is officially open to the public, you can have a perfect day, too.

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